And he looked heavy, I mean, who knew hed go flying. An Im delighted, like, that I dont have cancer cancer of the missin ball, an Im thinkin Ive a great story for the lads if ever I had the nerve to tell them, but all Im thinkin is, Am I fertile or not? New York, NY, Escape To Margaritaville Im in a great mood. Enrolling in a course lets you earn progress by passing quizzes and exams. Tom: Shoshanna: So I decided to go to the doctor. I thought, I dunno, I thought maybe they were so close together they felt like one, or maybe when one was down there, the other was off doing somethin else like I dunno, I just never thought about it. And I can be proud of who I am. Sullivan, ticket seller: Gonna marry him yourself, Dolly? We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Web. (a beat) If you say vampire I'll scream! I mean how hard is it to have one kid asleep at night in your house how hard is it but no . Far more interesting than all those silly girls at school. Three people died. is that, beyond the title song, there aren't any other truly standout songs. It won a Grammy and was number one for 9 weeks. So I suggest you do not tangle with me anymore. She seems to shed real tears in Dolly's monologues to her late husband Ephraim . These monologues will work well for auditions, perhaps a showreel update or for just some self-taping fun. Oh, it was fine. Made me compare with Hermias sphery eyne? When I said I would die a bachelor, I did not think I should live till I were married. Do you know oh, Im almost too embarrassed to admit this Adam misses the bus sometimes. Every evening for all these years I've put out the cat, I've locked the door, I've made myself a little rum toddy, and before I went to bed I said a prayer, thanking God that I was independent, that no one else's life was mixed up with mine. The fact is, Ive been acting like a prick. Joe, Vandergelder's barber: You'll have to sit still Mr Vandergelder, if I cut your throat it'll be practically unintentional. library of free monologues. Fare you well.. But then this guy called Corey joined our school, and suddenly all that stopped. See how I sashayed around the ballroom, Laura? I was thinking about what I was going to order when I remembered that I hadnt left anything out for Martin. Is everything alright? No dear. Watch instead for the musical numbers and the lavish costumes. Hello, Dolly! Oh my! I say Youre going to get a girl, buddy, just maybe not your cousin, huh? And then I give him a friendly pat on the back. Youre sorry?! Here's what you need to know about Cornelius: he's an incredibly innocent man, he's never been kissed, and he's full of, well, wonder. (defensive) There were circumstances. For instance, okay, junior year I dated this girl, Sue Hornick. I cant just live in this limbo. Then were in the bathroom, and shes putting all her makeup and shit into a bag, and shes telling me that its nothing Ive done, this Eric guy is totally different, they connect on a whole other level. But none of those times were quite right. I mean, who the hell does this guy or that guy think he is to give me such compliments? Meg bought me this T-shirt at the Warner Brothers store, and its got a picture of Superman on it. Sophia: Anyway, I go off and a couple of weeks later I go back for the ultrasound. A cold hard fact. I had my first beau at eleven. Heather: I see jonquils ! Philip: Why, it must be requited. Like foggy south puffing with wind and rain? Like they just need so much help and theyre in those ugly cages, you know what I mean? I cant sneak around on you. Im gonna give you the short version of an incredibly complicated and f up situation, so please be cool. So, I suddenly go off on her, like, this sophomore in high school, but Im all screaming in her face Dont look at the package, take a look in the mirror, you cow! Thats how it is with women. Flowers, notes, guinea-pig memorabilia were left outside in her memory. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. She is a widow in her middle years, an opportunist and a meddling matchmaker. By my troth, it is no addition to her wit nor no great argument of her folly, for I will be horribly in love with her. Than without candle may go dark to bed, Nor do I, really Its silly to be depressed by it. Anyway, I know Im trying to change the subject. --Rochelle O'Gorman, https://www.quotes.net/movies/hello,_dolly!_5140, https://www.quotes.net/movies/hello,_dolly!_quotes_5140. They say the lady is fair tis a truth, I can bear them witness. I thought of him searching through the fridge and not finding a morsel. Still, where would we be now if we had children? There are some who would be grateful for that--the plot is but a flimsy excuse to string together song and dance numbers. Hes not moving. It was as though a large piece of phlegm had lodged in my throat and my words couldnt pass it. It wasnt my fault, was it? All that being said, Hello, Dolly!, is one of the most famous songs in all of musical theater. Into the shower. O.K.? She looks at me and says, Are you aware that you only have one testicle? Well, I nearly dropped, or I would have only she was holding me by the and obviously one of them hadnt dropped, or somethin. Malaria fever and jonquils and then this boy. Dolly is a strong, high-spirited character who loves life and has a great deal of charm. Look, sex and love are separate thingsWell, they can be, thats all Im saying. No, Im not in Spain, dear. She slapped me. And the pretension! . Acting Monologues - Backstage Whenever, wherever I saw them, Id say, Stop ! Join StageAgent today and unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. Just thinking he might look at me, my heart starts pounding like mad. The point is Im messed up. So I start tellin her about my mole and cancer and all this and she starts feelin me like she had plastic gloves on and I was lyin on this bed, like a baby almost . (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Our 9x sold out online acting course returns soon. Picture this: Ive been through all the sitting, the waiting, spent three pounds thirty-nine on a mediocre sandwich, been wired up to a monitor, jogged, et cetera, Ive been jiggled about, prodded, pressed with some very chilly instruments, got released, finally, back into the world, with my clogged-up arteries and uncertain future, Im in the lift going down, who should I bump into? Horace: All the facts about you are insults! - Definition, Artists & Instruments, What Is Rumba? Don't worry about the lack of a solid story or Gene Kelly's pedestrian direction. I loved this monologue and I loved me character, but I'm not a huge fan of the musical. You probably think Im some spoiled brat whos never had it hard cause I didnt have to walk a mile to school. So take her to thee, shepherd. Maybe one night Im at a party, a bar, whatever, and I met a girl, and right off we know its a mutual attraction situation, and we have a little chat and a drink maybe, and next thing you know were in a cab, and theres a physical thing thats happening, and were chewing each others faces and trying to decide where to go, you know, your place or mine, only hold the phone here, there is no decision to be made, because youve got a key to my place, and I dont know if youve dropped by or what, and I dont want to chance putting either you or me in that awkward situation, so its off to her place somewhere in the East Eighties where Ive got to climb over her two roommates and three cats to do it on a foam mattress on the floor real, real quiet like because Sally my roommate has a commercial callback at nine- thirty in the morning and this whole time Im having some resentment towards you because your having a key meant that it had to be the cats and the floor and Sally the roommate asleep or nothing. Emily: In a minute someones going to bang on the lid and tell me to come out. Terrify me. I made the young men help me gather the jonquils ! Its envy, isnt it? Ive got angina. And as can be ascertained from the lyrics she is a very excitable figure, the life of the party so to speak. James: Like, you know what Bleek? One of those days. Made Brewster pigs in a blanket tonight before leavin. Thats why I dont think of it, Because youd be helpless, wouldnt you? Lines for Dolly in Hello, Dolly Flashcards Local caf girl is hit by a bike and a car and another bike. Not about the swearing, the things I called her, nothing. Pat, pat. Dance ability: some. Martins dead. Its always tricky finding a great comedy monologue as lets be honest, most comedy monologues arent exactly standup routines. Then its over. Like, if I blew her off to hang out with Kyle she would be like, Why didnt you call me back! Whats my thanks? Popular Writing these movies in my head where Adam and me are the stars. Just this, like, one tear I see as were sitting at a stoplight on the way home. Jesus, I nearly ran out of the place. Just for a minute. I empty the tube of jelly into the toilet, take my tube of muscle liniment, hold the two tubes nozzle to nozzle, and fill up the jelly tube with Tiger Balm. Ods my little life! Just dont come any closer. Never have. So what am I doing here, Audrey? Now I know this sounds like Im throwing away everything Ive said so far. Hes wearing this perplexed expression and hes saying you want me to leap tall buildings and be sensitive and supportive?! I have to haul ass to the kitchen, re-distribute the food and like squish in extra place-settings and people are on mismatched chairs and all. Dolly Levi: No man does, Horace, no man does. Maybe Ill never have someone get down on a knee and offer me a diamond ring. Make sure you have everything. Look, mate, I dont know whats happening I just arrived, right? She was such a dick. I got you into a Remington Party! So that ruined the mood. Irene Molloy: Minnie, I don't mind that you never finish your lunch, but I do mind that you never finish your sentences. The moment their eyes met, they fell in love. I cannot protect you. To get young players with experience I literally interviewed 1,000-2,000 people." BARBRA ARCHIVES 'HELLO, DOLLY!' PAGES: OVERVIEW (FIRST PAGE) Not just who we are- jobs or that kind of thing- but it does play into it as well. We aim to cover all bases some are from classical playwrights, and others from contemporary TV series. Break a finger, maybe. You know what I did? But doth not the appetite alter? remains in the common repertoire, though It Only Takes a Moment is making a slight comeback due to its use in 'Wall-e'. New York, NY, SM for Poor Yella Rednecks Even though I was pretty excited about what happened last night, and also about like, maybe like, the prospect of like, I dont know, like going out with you Which I would be very into, if you were. Invitations poured in parties all over the Delta! But I just-I just wish women would say what they mean. She doesnt say a word about it. Youre sorry?! --Rochelle O'Gorman Genre: Comedy, Musical, Romance Stars: Barbra Streisand, Walter Matthau, Michael Crawford, Marianne McAndrew Production: 20th Century Fox Won 3 Oscars. Hes about to say something. A widow in her middle years. This isnt working! One is Cornelius's 'wonderful things' monologue. Even taking into account the fact that youre dead, really ask yourself, if I asked you straight off Im going to stuff you in this box now, would you rather be alive or dead? I hadnt seen him since we split up, not once. And why, I pray you? PDF Hello Dolly! - Loudoun County Public Schools But then one of the other doctors popped in, called him Nigel, mentioned something about badminton so I thought: probably not. Hello Dolly Monologue Flashcards | Quizlet Audition Sides: Dolly DOLLY Ephraim, let me go! Not enough to live with. But what I hope is that you dont really know how you feel for me, and that maybe when you figure it out youll realize its the same way I feel for you. Because the truth is despite all facts to the contraryI still love you madly. This thing with Naomi-okay, it should never have happened-but it didnt have to impact on what I have with Meg. 5 reasons to see 'Hello, Dolly!' at Dayton Playhouse Lysander! I just thought you were the most wonderful man that ever lived. 1. The poor man, he was such a clean person when he was alive. Thats all. Okay. Forget it. Some of us, however, love big, splashy, overdone musical scenes, of which the. And I didnt wanna, like, marry you? The change of climate from East Tennessee to the Delta weakened resistance I had a little temperature all the time not enough to be serious just enough to make me restless and giddy. Its just that for a moment I thought Martin was still with me and I panicked. I know where all the nukes are and I know the codes. If only I was a little quicker. Happy is Hermia, wheresoeer she lies; He tells me theres a one in four chance Im not fertile, that I cant be a father, like. When it was time for her to leave, he asked if he could look at her face for a while so that he would have something beautiful to remember in the long months ahead. You stand there trying to look so deep when youre nothing but a solipsistic bully with your grandiose self-importance and lectures and arias and lets-look-at-the- fucking-canvas-for-another-few-weeks-lets-not-fucking-paint-lets-just-look. Hello, Dolly! To unlock this lesson you must be a Study.com Member. I just fuckin killed Chuck. She is the lead in a musical which shares the same name as the song. I put it to you, Camp Firewood, as we spend the last dinner together: Be proud of who you are. Who might be your mother, He called me by my name. I highly recommend reading or watching some of the writers work to get the nuance of that writer: a Neil Simon monologue is very different to a Phoebe Waller-Bridge. Or how they view my choices and, yes, maybe that makes me not very deep, or petty, or some other word, hell, I dont know! Can you believe it? A monologue is a speech that a character gives during a theatrical piece. The CSAS alum casts her spell over Broadway musical's tour What monologue should I use for my Hello Dolly audition? I need - Quora Im nuts, you know, Im really crazy. Firecrackers, literally, not figuratively. I get a car right away. Cause I couldnt hide from him. He cant take his eyes off me. And somehow youre expected to guess when they want you to be controlling and when they want you to be crying-and if you dont make the right guess at the right time its instantly construed as proof that you dont love them enough. Some are laugh out loud, but others are more subtle. Im a genius. Beatrix, the 17-year old president of the student body, after her ex-friend deviously cancels the prom. You seem like a real sweet girl and I, just, I dont want you to get hurt. Then I get home and I make him breakfast. Its totally weird, like, taking all your clothes off and having sex with someone you barely know, and then being like Whats up now? You know? I do know that I am, and I cant overcome it, I mean. when guys come up to me, with their cheesy lines, (imitating guy) Hey, you have such a beautiful smile or Can I just tell you that you are so beautiful. Glittering stage numbers showcase a commanding Barbra Streisand as Dolly Levy, a New York matchmaker who can find a mate for anyone. Hello Dolly Script | PDF | Entertainment (General) | Theatre Monologue from Hello, Dolly!-Cornelius Hackl - YouTube 0:00 / 1:58 Monologue from Hello, Dolly!-Cornelius Hackl Singing Rome 42 subscribers Subscribe 11 Share 1.1K views 7 years ago Show more. They just don't make musicals like this any more. Care about you a lot, and that makes it superhard. And youre sorry! That you will just stand still. Cooking for all you nice people has really helped me get over the fact that I fought in the Vietnam War. Hello Dolly! Script - transcript from the screenplay and/or Barbara Uncontrollable passion, etcetera. Backstage is the top resource for acting monologues content and jobs that will help you land your dream opportunity . But heres the thing, I tried college for a year. The other three are Stephanie Block, the baker's wife, Tony Award winner for "The Cher Show;" Gavin Creel, Cinderella's prince/wolf, Tony winner for "Hello, Dolly;" and Sebastian Arcellus, the . Hello, Dolly! Im not mad. Im a fact checker for Christs sake. I know every girl at school except Monica is in love with him. I pulled myself up, I studied hard, I read every book in the library and now I work for the government and have the highest possible security clearance. How came her eyes so bright? I love you Kate. Tom: On one hand, I want to forget her. Im sorry I said anything to Dennis. Squire Squire, Hackham and whos the other one? Dear old Mom and Dad. Audition Songs for Hello, Dolly! - By Character | Theatre Trip But the problem is.despite every fact I can muster, theres something that still doesnt check out. Megan: Always the same, isnt it. But you know what? The composer. . And then I almost threw up, because that lady who smells of egg went by, and also because what if, what if wed stayed together, what if hed asked me, and Id said yes in a moment of madness and let him do his thing, and wed done the normal stuff, and had the babies, would that be my life now? And you know what Im gonna get her back. Since Im being judged by a jury of my peers I will attempt to insert like and totally into my confession as much as possible. Bacon and eggs and buttered toast. So even though youve technically lost, youve really won. So I stood there in the shop, and there were loads of congratulations cards new babies, pink and blue, storks with bundles, balloons, all spewing out. But if farts were flattery, honey he would be Shakespeare. And Im like, Whats the problem? and he says The problem is, dude, youre fucking my girlfriend. So I look at Marissa and Im like Youre someones girlfriend? And she says No. Then it comes out Chuck just wishes shes his girlfriend but actually shes his cousin or something, so hes got these feelings of guilt about wanting herand then he starts crying. So she tells me then that I might have what they call an undescended testes, meanin that one dropped, but the other didntshe said Id have to get it checked out, cos if there was one still up there it would have to be removed because, guess what it could become cancerous. Thats where were at now, and now some pricks actually done something about it, and killed three thousand people, and the Americans are fucking mad as hell, because they know every single one of them is on that plane hurtling towards the Twin Towers and they dont like it and theyre not going to stand for it, and theyre going to get the pricks thatre threatening them. Required fields are marked *. Louis Armstrong's recording of the title song, Hello, Dolly! Shakespeare in the Woods 2023 Season I didnt come here for help. You guys check all this stuff out and load up the van. No, theyre not in Spain, theyre next to the phone in the study. I thought that was the deal. - Definition, History & Artists, What Is Rap Music? Beatrix: Monologues are presented on StageAgent for educational purposes only. Well, okay, um There were a few times that I couldve done that. Irene Molloy: What's this? Im sorry to do this to you, but I was afraid Id never get the chance to tell you. Next thing I know her clothes are off and were loosening roof shingles like theres no tomorrow. Proud of what hes achieved. was first performed The first talent to play Dolly Which artist most significantly recorded the title song The length of the musical's first run Characters who had. And if its to do with letting the house then youll have to ring the house-agents, because theyre the agents for the house. Impossible! Dont repeat that. What Im sure of is this- we need to stop. The conference was sadly borne; they have the truth of this from Hero. Therefore no marvel though Demetrius One year later, she went back for a second interview. If Id known Naomi felt like that I wouldve broken it off with her months ago. That was the night! I definitely caved in to the peer pressure. Hello, Dolly! A young actor might want to look at the character of Claudio in . (She raises her skirt and does a mincing step around the room. Because the fact is we just met yesterday. Im weak. But I feel it coming up now, more and more, and I just think- No, thats bullshit, actually, the whole work thing. Minnie Fay's Monologue // Hello Dolly - YouTube I know how to open champagne with a sword. Gonna be insane. But then I was thinkin, well what would I like better have a woman or a man feeling me? I searched high and low through that kitchen. They used to try to blow me up. And it just defies all reason. It doesnt matter. My entire life! You have come to the right page. All right, Ill hold them myself And then I (She stops in front of the picture.) I know its hopeless. (Banging on the floor with his fists. Tis not your inky brows, your black silk hair, Research Playwrights, Librettists, Composers and Lyricists. Thats about as bad as it can get! Comedy Monologues | StageMilk For I must tell you friendly in your ear, is a musical filled with charisma and with heart. Now you listen and listen good. The Fact Checker: There are some who would be grateful for that--the plot is but a flimsy excuse to string together song and dance numbers. Left the shop. I did. Sorry! I cant believe it. Theres pee freckles on the ceiling!! I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A WOMAN WHO ARRANGES THINGS. You see, heres the problem. "Her husband's death has been recent, she's more in love with his memory. Im taking care of it. (Just pull the shades first.) My friend Boomers hooking me up a job at the Mercedes dealership on Jericho Turnpike. was an important and frequently covered piece. Its not you. Hello Dolly Monologue Minnie Fay Book file PDF. Do you ever think of yourself as actually dead, lying in a box with a lid on it? Why? Why were you talking to Janis Ian? You want to come inside, have some chicken fingers awesome. It used to seriously piss me off. The only fucking person I have ever allowed to call me Judy. boarding school! Martin wouldnt be wanting his dinner because Martins not with me any more. I thought you were just creative and I thought you were just smarter than me and more sensitive and more interesting. Zelda: Like, one of my favourites is that the bus breaks down one day in this remote place and there we are stranded together. I hear how I am censured: they say I will bear myself proudly if I perceive the love come from her. And bein a good father like encouragin your kids, givin them a tenner if theyre stuck, askin them how they are, always knowin if somethin was up, bein there for them, bein there for them always, always givin your life for them, givin your life to them fuckin hell, thats the kind of person you want to be somebody, more of those kind of people, the kind of person I want to be. Cornelius Hackl: We're gonna close the store. Hello Dolly Monologue Minnie Fay (2022) - www.thyroidccc But it turns out bikes can go fast and flip you into the road. I wouldnt think about it, if I were you. I find actors always have great dramatic pieces on their casting profiles, or at auditions, but rarely have a great comic monologue. She starts to pack up her diaphragm and jelly, and I say cant you hold off on the fucking until you know a little better just what the fuck you are doing? The Matchmaker | Thornton Wilder Society Cos I got bored and had sex with you? Harrys a bit fat. Now if you dont mind, I have some unfinished business to attend to. Horace: I'm going to march in the 14th street parade with the only kind of people I can trust, 700 men. Hello, Dolly! (film) - Wikipedia I loved you and believed you and pretended not to notice the Streisand thing. And thats not me. I wanna introduce you guys to someone. You know what? That you insult, exult, and all at once, (beat) No thank-yous no yum-yums not a peep, tho Man is silent as the grave. Your mum must be pretty stoked that youre not taking me. Back, through, around, behind. Anyone but herself, that is. This monologue is from Thornton Wilder's "The Matchmaker". It is, however, a peculiar type of script and does not have the single most important aspect of acting which is listening/reacting. I says. The consultant basically said I could pop my clogs at any moment. Its me. The fact is, you hardly know me! Oversized jacket. Sister Winnie: I thought you could just change my life and show me the whole world. Monika: Possess your soul in patience you will see! "Hello, Dolly! One night I rounded them up, put them in a cage, doused them with Louis Armstrong's "Hello, Dolly!". Dude, I understand. No, the world must be peopled. I liked this girl. Irene Molloy: Do get done with that, Minnie. (She wears a girlish frock of yellowed voile with a blue silk sash. New York, NY, Accessibility Statement Terms Privacy |StageAgent 2020. Discover our acting monologues to prepare for your auditions. That was the spring I had the craze for jonquils. Loved her even. Here are five reasons why you should see this feel-good showcase, breezily directed with audience-friendly engagement by Brian Sharp and featuring fabulous turn-of-the-century costumes by . Ruben: Quotes.net. I had to stand up to her. And he starts in on how hes just this total fuck up and maybe he should just throw himself off the roof. You were a Brownie, you were a Bluebird, you were a Girl Scout Cookie! For she hath blessed and attractive eyes. Let me just begin by saying that there are two sides to every story. "We've created a new Dolly Levi, a very young widow," Kelly explained. 'Hello, Dolly!' Theater Review - The Hollywood Reporter They called me a freak. And she was beautiful. People come that like, didnt R.S.V.P.! And you will help me. Not literally. Excuse Me Of course WA AHHH Minnie hold your tongue There's a man in there ! HELLO, DOLLY! Because I always swear. 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Maybe if I just vomited on myself the guy would walk the other way but I bet even then, Id get, The way you vomit on yourself is just so, so delightful., All I want is to be left alone. Okay So, I love you so much, like to the end of the world and back, butsometimes I love you like I feel sorry for a monkey. On this chip he had laboriously painted my grandmothers face, using ashes mixed with water for ink, and his own hair as a paintbrush.